{"id":7695,"date":"2013-10-22T13:50:34","date_gmt":"2013-10-22T11:50:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/?p=7695"},"modified":"2020-09-01T20:13:24","modified_gmt":"2020-09-01T18:13:24","slug":"lauras-life-with-adhd","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/het-leven-van-laura-met-adhd\/","title":{"rendered":"Laura finds out after years of rollercoasting that she has ADHD"},"content":{"rendered":"<aside class=\"mashsb-container mashsb-main mashsb-stretched\"><div class=\"mashsb-box\"><div class=\"mashsb-buttons\"><a class=\"mashicon-facebook mash-large mash-center mashsb-noshadow\" href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/sharer.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.addkenmerken.net%2Fen%2Fhet-leven-van-laura-met-adhd%2F%3Futm_source%3Dsharebuttons%26utm_medium%3Dfacebook%26utm_campaign%3Dmashshare\" target=\"_top\" rel=\"nofollow\"><span class=\"icon\"><\/span><span class=\"text\">Share<\/span><\/a><a class=\"mashicon-twitter mash-large mash-center mashsb-noshadow\" href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/intent\/tweet?text=&amp;url=https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/?p=7695&amp;via=krachtvanADHD\" target=\"_top\" rel=\"nofollow\"><span class=\"icon\"><\/span><span class=\"text\">Tweet<\/span><\/a><div class=\"onoffswitch2 mash-large mashsb-noshadow\" style=\"display:none\"><\/div><\/div>\n            <\/div>\n                <div style=\"clear:both\"><\/div><\/aside>\n            <!-- Share buttons by mashshare.net - Version: 4.0.47--><h2><span style=\"color: #000000;\">Laura's life with ADHD<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright wp-image-14663\" src=\"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/10\/Heb-ik-ADHD.jpg\" alt=\"Do I have ADHD\" width=\"322\" height=\"268\" title=\"\">I am 15 years old and sitting in class. I feel like I have to vomit and leave the class to go to the toilet. Once there, the feeling subsides, so back to class I go. When I sit in the school desk again, the same feeling hits me again, what is going on? Am I getting sick? Damn, to the loo again. What will they think of me....... This is a start of a period of a few weeks where the same feeling comes and goes. My god, I seem crazy.......... Will it be tension then?<\/p>\n<p>I had a serious motorbike accident with my boyfriend, who is 10 years older. I still live with my parents, but not long after, I move in with him. Fifteen years......... Weeks, months, years go by. I don't remember much, only highlights. And those are usually intense, not such fun events. Friday night, out on the town, having dinner with a friend. In the restaurant, I get a huge feeling that I am going to throw up, no, not again. I panic and immediately go home, thinking she'll think I'm really crazy. It is the beginning of 4 years of street fear, hyperventilation and a spitting phobia. As if by coincidence (although I don't believe in coincidence), I find out through articles that I hyperventilate, which gives me the spitting sensation.<\/p>\n<p>But....... What do you do about it? I get relaxants from the GP. Result: addiction. 8 to 10 oxazepam a day, but still I don't get calm. Eventually I stop overnight, because the desired effect is no longer there. Therapy here, therapy there, nothing helps. Eventually I \u201cget over it\u201d on my own.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/the-storm-called-adhd\/\">Relationships<\/a> come and go. They quickly bore me. I want to be stimulated, don't like boring. I wind people around my finger with my spontaneity and enthusiasm. Men fall for me like bunches but long-term relationships are not for me. I behave abominably after weeks, months, but I don't know why I do it. Whoever does what, I never approve, always have comments. Severe mood swings and tantrums. I know I am not this person. I know what I do is not right. So why am I doing it? Why do I feel so different. Why do I feel like I am made up of two people? That someone regularly takes me over and makes me do things I don't support at all? Relationships don't work out, I do want children, always wanted them.<\/p>\n<p>Through a friend I get pregnant, very subconsciously consciously. I am 28 years old. Meet another man. Don't know I'm pregnant yet and get into a relationship. As soon as I know I'm expecting I tell him and he chooses to do this with me. I wanted to become a BOM mother, but am actually too scared to do it alone and cling to this man. He raises my eldest child as his own and we have another daughter. After 9 years of \u201cholding on\u201d, I leave him. Literally sick with unhappiness. Immediately I dive into another relationship, taking my children with me. Another child I gain. My children also have a hard time with me. On the one hand such a loving mother, on the other their terror, I feel terrible. I am not good enough, my children deserve so much better.......... This relationship is also ending. He can't handle my behaviour anymore. I don't get it, it's not because of me, is it? HE can't communicate! I can!<\/p>\n<p>I am applying to Psyq. Over the years I have read a lot and for a long time I thought I had borderline, but because I had also read once that there were no medications for it, I didn't deal with it. I am fed up, I don't want to be this person. At a telephone consultation, a lady asks me: have you ever thought about <a title=\"Characteristics of ADHD\" href=\"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/characteristics-of-adhd\/\">ADHD<\/a> thought? I start laughing hard. No, this had never crossed my mind before. ADHD is busy bouncing around, right? After several tests, which also involve my parents and two girlfriends, the diagnosis is ADHD and then the most annoying form. They think there is something else, but they want to try to find out during coaching sessions. I feel relieved, I'm not crazy, I just have ADHD. Ok, big deal, let's get to work.<\/p>\n<p>I start with an information session. Helpful information and the contact with other ADHDers is a relief. Then comes the blow. This is something that won't go away. Which could have prevented so much misery if I had known earlier........... But I can't turn it back, so I choose not to stay in the well. Fierce as I always was against chemical junk, I'm starting lexapro and concerta anyway. Wow what a peace........... no more songs in my head, no more 100 things in my head at once, no more distractions and for the first time I can concentrate very well at work. The depressions are less intense, the mood swings are gone. No more anger attacks.<\/p>\n<p>Two months after examination, my eldest child is also found to have ADHD and also ODD. That will be a tough one, but precisely because I understand him so well, because I have it myself, I think he is in the right place with me. Because I have love and patience for my children in abundance.......... For the rest, patience is not in my dictionary. He mainly suffers from concentration disorders and is regularly at odds with teachers. Can't take responsibility for his own behaviour, it's always someone else's fault. But oh such a wonderfully smart kid with a sense of humour!<\/p>\n<p>My eldest daughter has nothing, but seems (after investigation) to be in a disturbed relationship with me, thanks to my behaviour and thanks to the divorce between her father and me. We will work on this too. I don't feel guilty. It happened, I can't change what has been, I can change the future for her. The youngest of 5............... can be so into her own world...... but you know, that's allowed and it's okay.<\/p>\n<p>We are a special family, with us it is never boring. We can bounce wonderfully together and we love each other. I'm not crazy, I just have ADHD.<\/p>\n<p>Laura<\/p>\n<p>Scroll down to leave your reaction to Laura's life story.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-uagb-marketing-button uagb-marketing-btn__outer-wrap uagb-marketing-btn__align-center uagb-marketing-btn__align-text-center uagb-marketing-btn__icon-before\" id=\"uagb-marketing-btn-bc07d9fd-afab-465d-bd82-96e12407b527\"><div class=\"uagb-marketing-btn__wrap\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/category\/life-stories\/\" class=\"uagb-marketing-btn__link\" target=\"\" rel=\"noopener \"><div class=\"uagb-marketing-btn__title-wrap\"><h6 class=\"uagb-marketing-btn__title\">View all submitted life stories here<\/h6><\/div><div class=\"uagb-marketing-btn__prefix-wrap\"><p class=\"uagb-marketing-btn__prefix\"><\/p><\/div><\/a><\/div><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The life of Laura with ADHD I am 15 years old and in class. I feel like I need to spit and leave...<\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":14663,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1162,1506,1132,552],"tags":[6,691],"class_list":["post-7695","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-volwassenen-met-add-adhd","category-add-adhd","category-adhd-artikelen","category-levensverhalen","tag-adhd","tag-verhaal"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7695","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7695"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7695\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/14663"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7695"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7695"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7695"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}