{"id":8140,"date":"2014-01-22T10:17:59","date_gmt":"2014-01-22T09:17:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/?p=8140"},"modified":"2019-09-30T16:06:26","modified_gmt":"2019-09-30T14:06:26","slug":"debbys-wild-life-with-adhd","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/debbys-wilde-leven-met-adhd\/","title":{"rendered":"Debby's wild life with ADHD"},"content":{"rendered":"<aside class=\"mashsb-container mashsb-main mashsb-stretched\"><div class=\"mashsb-box\"><div class=\"mashsb-count mash-large\" style=\"float:left\"><div class=\"counts mashsbcount\">37<\/div><span class=\"mashsb-sharetext\">shared<\/span><\/div><div class=\"mashsb-buttons\"><a class=\"mashicon-facebook mash-large mash-center mashsb-noshadow\" href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/sharer.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.addkenmerken.net%2Fen%2Fdebbys-wilde-leven-met-adhd%2F%3Futm_source%3Dsharebuttons%26utm_medium%3Dfacebook%26utm_campaign%3Dmashshare\" target=\"_top\" rel=\"nofollow\"><span class=\"icon\"><\/span><span class=\"text\">Share<\/span><\/a><a class=\"mashicon-twitter mash-large mash-center mashsb-noshadow\" href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/intent\/tweet?text=&amp;url=https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/?p=8140&amp;via=krachtvanADHD\" target=\"_top\" rel=\"nofollow\"><span class=\"icon\"><\/span><span class=\"text\">Tweet<\/span><\/a><div class=\"onoffswitch2 mash-large mashsb-noshadow\" style=\"display:none\"><\/div><\/div>\n            <\/div>\n                <div style=\"clear:both\"><\/div><\/aside>\n            <!-- Share buttons by mashshare.net - Version: 4.0.47--><h2><span style=\"color: #000000;\">ADHD and work, medication and acrimonious relationships<br><\/span><\/h2>\n<p>Hi everyone,<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_8141\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-8141\" style=\"width: 228px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/Debby-Colijn.jpg\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener \"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-8141\" src=\"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/Debby-Colijn.jpg\" alt=\"Debby Colijn&#039;s life with ADHD\" width=\"228\" height=\"302\" title=\"\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/Debby-Colijn.jpg 260w, https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/Debby-Colijn-226x300.jpg 226w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 228px) 100vw, 228px\"><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-8141\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Debby Colijn<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was 6 years old. I had to take Ritalin but even then I said: I'm not crazy, I threw the pills away after a while at school because I was bullied enough for my behaviour. In my later life I had many problems, during puberty hugely rebellious, ended up in institutions because my mum couldn't cope with me anymore etc.<\/p>\n<p>From my first serious relationship, I had 2 kids (first mum at 18), but he was constantly cheating on me, I didn't know how to work, I didn't have my first steady job until I was 24, that's when I got into action, I couldn't and didn't know how to manage my household or finances, so I got into a lot of debt (now all in the past, thank God), my household was one big mess, I couldn't sort anything and I felt very unhappy, which didn't really motivate me. I didn't cook, we ate a bag of chips more than once as long as our kids had everything, and even then.<\/p>\n<p>Another relationship of 6 months after that , that boy was normal, and sweet, and then due to some problem had to come back to the fact that I might really have ADHD or <a title=\"ADD\" href=\"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener \">ADD<\/a> Then I was doing better for a while, until I became single again because his mother was constantly bothering us and I wanted to join the army (2005), which he didn't like. I started taking tests for the army, but was too honest at the psych exam and said I had ADHD, so extra tests, extra tests, and more tests, until at a certain point I couldn't control myself any more, I thought I finally knew the result after driving up and down from Antwerp to Vilvoorde five times, it turned out I had to take tests again, then started crying in front of the secretary because of the nerves... Afterwards, I was labelled not stress resistant and therefore rejected. I had exercised intensively for 4 months to get the physical test &amp; bmi in order, had been on a strict diet, been to the dentist, etc., but was rejected on psychological grounds...<\/p>\n<p>Anyway, stopped taking Concerta because then again I thought I didn't have ADHD after all, met my next boyfriend, then turned out to be an aggressive man with borderline or, I think <span style=\"color: #000000;\">schizophrenia, all the way, he controlled me, manipulated me, beat me, etc.... <\/span>Then also started working on a job, under pressure from him (positive point) . 6 month, resigned, 5 month resigned, 1 year resigned, ... The relationship also went from bad to worse, also went up and down, was a love-hate relationship, lots of passion but unfortunately also dangerous fights.<\/p>\n<p>My kids I would see every weekend, then every 2 weekends, because they lived with daddy because I had to get out of the pit first, daddy took advantage of it and got to keep my kids with him, now I also had to watch what I did because otherwise he used everything against me and my kids were my world. That relationship didn't really help me see my kids again either. Complaint filed, fired a few more times, all chaos and misery. During that relationship I also came across ADHD again, took pills again, better again, but of course those pills didn't change my ex who drank a bottle of wine every day on his own, was addicted to joints &amp; poker for money, to sex &amp; in the end had to take antipsychotics... I came out of that relationship terribly scared, also cheated on him with a colleague, but I think that's justified... Then finally got rid of him after 4 years.<\/p>\n<p>Then had the best time of my life. Living alone, finally found a steady job, still had extra income, kids were with me regularly, I finally had girlfriends. I was finally happy. 2 years I was single, and finally had a stable life, when I met my current husband through a dating site. Everyone thought I would stay single forever because my bar was so high that no one seemed to satisfy, except to flirt with for a while. But he seemed different . He was sweet, and , different ... One thing led to another and now he is the dad of my 2nd son, my 3rd child, we are married and I have a steady job, ... BUT ... He is sometimes too sweet. And I don't treat him like he deserves.... For this reason, and because of my sleeping problems (since I was pregnant with my son) I went to see a psychologist. Who said at one point, maybe you just have <a href=\"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/characteristics-of-adhd\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener \">ADHD<\/a>? And then I started looking again, googling, soon they will test me, but I must say I recognise myself completely in everything. To name a few: fickle (extremely) short-tempered, forgetful, chaotic, need for structure, black-and-white thinking, extremely emotional, constantly in need of kicks &amp; challenges, quickly tired of everything, sleeping problems, brooding, nonchalant, not subtle, likes peace and quiet and being alone, extremely nervous,... That's all me... So now I do think I have a form of ADHD.<\/p>\n<p>Somehow, I hope this will be confirmed soon. It would explain the mess that is my past. Fortunately, I have learnt to deal with lol many things myself, like putting everything in my diary, trying to make lists and failing a lot in ut beginning, housekeeping (now I am a perfectionist) , but still I feel that I am still different from others.... Very different... And I am so tired of that feeling. Sometimes I think people think, heh that's a weird one, what's he saying now? Or they make me insecure because they don't understand me (while I just talk too quietly).... Pfff , quite a soup, but I would like to hear what you think? ADHD indeed? Or do you recognise something from my story? Am curious!!!<\/p>\n<p>Greetings Debby<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-uagb-marketing-button uagb-marketing-btn__outer-wrap uagb-marketing-btn__align-center uagb-marketing-btn__align-text-center uagb-marketing-btn__icon-before\" id=\"uagb-marketing-btn-bc07d9fd-afab-465d-bd82-96e12407b527\"><div class=\"uagb-marketing-btn__wrap\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/category\/life-stories\/\" class=\"uagb-marketing-btn__link\" target=\"\" rel=\"noopener \"><div class=\"uagb-marketing-btn__title-wrap\"><h6 class=\"uagb-marketing-btn__title\">View all submitted life stories here<\/h6><\/div><div class=\"uagb-marketing-btn__prefix-wrap\"><p class=\"uagb-marketing-btn__prefix\"><\/p><\/div><\/a><\/div><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>ADHD and work, medication and acrimonious relationships Hi everyone, I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was 6. I had to take Ritalin but I said at the time:...<\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":8141,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[552,1506,1132,1162],"tags":[5,6,289,272,743,700,288,742],"class_list":["post-8140","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-levensverhalen","category-add-adhd","category-adhd-artikelen","category-volwassenen-met-add-adhd","tag-add","tag-adhd","tag-concerta","tag-kinderen","tag-ontslagen","tag-relaties","tag-ritalin","tag-werk"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8140","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8140"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8140\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/8141"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8140"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8140"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.addkenmerken.net\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8140"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}