Nicky with ADD depicts her life in a drawing

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  1. Dear all,

    I am a mother of a 9-year-old daughter who was diagnosed with ADD 2 weeks ago also she is highly gifted and HSP. Am so glad we know this now so we can take everything into account in a focused way and give her insight. I am looking for info on ADD and experiences of other parents who have a child with ADD and experiences with medication use. I
    hope someone will share his/her experiences so I can do the best for our beautiful girl.

    Kind regards

  2. I have little more to say after your stories because everything is recognisable. I found out after 3 mbo courses and many workplaces that I have ADD and was also always compensating myself to keep up with the rest. I have been depressed by it and am now recovering. Fortunately, I am 22 and have a whole life ahead of me. medication works well and I work much more efficiently and rationally. The world is suddenly open to me. But I have to work extra hard on myself when my medication wears off. The tricks I taught myself to be "normal" I forget now because many more things come naturally. I think that's why without medication it's extra difficult now. But there is hope and I really believe that we can deal with it and then we can start achieving a lot of nice things in our lives!

  3. A tip if you want a help with planning; 1look diary (paper or online) has really helped our 11-year-old daughter tremendously!!! And us too because we can track her diary on our iphone.

  4. Hello Nicky,
    Wow... I now catch myself looking for a story like yours for a long time! I'm 22 myself and have known since a few months that I have ADD, after getting quite depressed. Almost overworked. Now I know that I have been compensating for a long time. Fighting very hard to keep up normally and (although I am very extroverted) hiding panic that I felt as soon as I stopped following a conversation, arrived late, forgot something again or met myself in other ways. Although I have no history with drugs, I have always been precisely away from them. Somehow I think I subconsciously knew I would be prone to it, addiction.
    I have had many moments of failure in my life. At one point, I had a fear that I might not be able to have a job at all. Now I have already built up much of my self-confidence, and thanks to the diagnosis I am learning to accept myself. By trial and error, though. I still regularly find it very hard, especially with my internships (now full-time with children with autism, adhd, odd, etc.). But also the planning and remembering, keeping an overview etc. I hope that soon I will finally be able to believe in myself in this. The idea that there are people with a story like yours reassures me. I am not alone. In fact, it is sometimes quite difficult to convey to others what it is like. Hopefully, in a while, I will look at myself the way you do. No more that negative little voice in my head formed by people who didn't understand me in my life. Also, I hope I won't think about it as much as I do now. Almost every day. And I also talk about it a lot, but then that's one of my dings haha.
    Well, it does me a lot of good to read this and be able to share my story here! I'm sure we'll all be fine!
    Thanks for your inspiring story!
    X Dionne

  5. Hey all,
    Super nice responses to my drawing and story.
    I really liked knowing that I am not the only one who suffers sometimes.
    And am not the only one who has been searching for years how to deal with myself and what medication suits me?
    How do I create peace in my body and in my head! Remco I indeed also have a drug history. People with ADD are prone to that. Self-medication they call it. Drugs gave me peace in my head, windlessness then became pure enjoyment so I became addicted and after long use very confused and so that was not the solution!!! Never again!
    I have been off drugs for over 3 years now.
    And after much talking and gaining more insight into myself, I now know what to do and what not to do, and I now know how to live my life healthily.
    My medication Welbutrin is a relief. It is still busy in my head but more in the background. It is no longer as strong a presence and I am very happy about that.
    I am 23 and have a whole life ahead of me.
    I'm glad I know I have ADD and am therefore not crackpot:p
    If you have ADD, you are just slightly different from the rest and you should try to accept that about yourself and especially not compare yourself to someone else because that will make you unhappy.
    Indeed, friendships are also very important to me. I express what I feel to my friends and also if I am uncertain about something they can reassure me.
    That I have the memory of a fish is common knowledge and they don't blame me for that:p
    That I forget birthdays and don't even know what date my own mother's birthday is is also taken for granted because that's just the way I am.
    And they now know that I jump from heel to heel in conversation and that can be quite sociable.
    I only find it annoying when I talk through someone because then I want to say something but if I wait for someone to finish talking I forget what I want to say so I say it and then come back to what the other person said hahaha
    I enjoy reading your stories!
    Greetings nicky

  6. What a story! Glad you now know what that extra is now! I've only known I have ADHD/borderline since 2011. I call this my 2 perks... Not knowing you have this and always being mistaken for a fool.... Now that I know this and am taking ritalin, therapy for borderline I am doing a lot better too! I'm almost 56 now! Hope now that you know this you can live a happy and nice life. Lots of love from Jane

  7. Dear nicky

    Your drawing says it all. I have also been diagnosed with ADD since a few months and, as if that is not enough, I also have pdd-nos and borderline. After years of a drug and alcohol past, I had to go into detox to get rid of them. Once I finished detox, these chronic conditions showed themselves. Currently, I am doing reasonably well. I am now on 2 types of medication to control the borderline and the ADD. This still takes a lot of effort and a lot of energy but it is going in the right direction. I am also in the meantime 6 months drink and drug free. I also know I can't and won't touch anything anymore because of relapse but that's something you have to live with. I see my ADD and pdd-nos as a gift. This combination makes me very hypersensitive to the atmosphere around me. I can sense when something is wrong or something is very good as soon as I walk into a room or space. This can sometimes come in handy. I wish you good luck with your gift and hope you can see the positive in it.

    Greetings Remco

  8. I am Nicky's mother and can only say : Proud, in her own way she knows how to live her life. She is getting better and better at it. Nicky you will get there. Keep up the good work.

  9. How recognisable it all is! Both Nicky's story and Petra's reaction. I have known for about three years that I have ADHD but I strongly believe it is ADD. Tried LTO3 which unfortunately did not help me. Since 1/1 I have been taking methylphenidate. I am a bit calmer in my head but do not notice much difference. Next week is the first evaluation of the medicine use. I do notice that I myself am becoming increasingly aware of the negative characteristics and thus consequences of AD(H)D and find it especially difficult to explain. Not everyone around me understands it which doesn't make it any easier. Sometimes I feel alone and insecure but on the other hand it also makes me stronger; don't mess with me! ;-)

  10. Hi Nicky,

    Yes I recognise it all, especially the bit about if it's important enough for me it does stick, so that's why I always forget birthdays and boring appointments. Less than an hour ago my phone beeped...oh yeah!!! Forgotten jumped in the car and just in time. The smartphone is THE invention for someone with ADD, all the appointments I make go straight into the google calendar that syncs with my iphone and everything WITH alarm a 15 minutes in advance.

    And what you don't mention but is also important, people have to call your name first! Only then do you listen! So often I hear Marc MAAAARC! Yes we are talking to you! And I say maybe you should call my name first so I know you're talking to me! (because all the blabbering goes in one ear and out the other).

    I find the lack of understanding from others who think you are weird and lazy the most difficult, also the thinking while talking, and vice versa is very annoying with job applications, I am not insecure but that is how you come across when you sometimes stop in the middle of your sentence to think (where was I going with my story) Sometimes the reactions to your story distract you.

    Keeping work and looking for work is thus difficult.

    Gather the good people around you people who stay, who also want to understand you... all the others are not of much use to you, call them acquaintances rather than friends. Believe me that helps to avoid disappointments because an ADDer expects more from his friends than anyone else, we need that attention from people who understand us.

    Good luck!

  11. so recognisable..... here on medication for over six months now.... a lot more peace and quiet...although I still have my fits.... but that also makes me me.... now I have to get to grips with my impulsiveness and then everything will be a lot calmer here!!... working is still difficult for me I really don't know what I want, I like everything but get bored quickly too.....

    1. Very recognisable this! After having had quite a few different jobs, I have now found a combo,still too many, but all fun. The alternation between physical work and mental challenges works well for me. I also notice that short projects are more manageable. That helps in making choices.
      - Home counselling (expert by experience; haha!) : always a few hours then travel again= get out of it,fresh air.
      -Cleaning work: social-helping people-thankfulness and visible results-also short time pieces (just doesn't earn as much-well-sustainable-also nice)
      -Pedicure 1 client-1 foot- 1 toe at a time,and own time schedule. Always a bit the same but always a different puzzle,with the human factor.Very tricky though is the administration....
      Maybe it will help you to include the "working form" in your choice as well?
      Good luck!